things i have learned in this life (mainly on the road)

1. you are never as funny as you think you are.
2. you can be stopped by the police two days in a row without even trying.
3. even when you are happy you don't have to take defensive driving, because it's only been a month since the last class, your spouse won't be happy with you.
4. the maker's diet can make you faint and your heart race.
5. especially when you decide on day 10 you are sick of all the food and you will just drink large amounts of strong coffee.
6. oatmeal raisin cookies taste really good when you've been living on meat and flaxseed oil for 10 days.
7. facebook is not addicting, it's the feel of the iPhone in my hand.
8. eating no carbs may lead to speeding tickets.
9. iPhones + driving = just don't go there
10. the patio at El Chilito juts out further into the parking spaces then i thought.
11. my collision insurance deductible is 250.
12. a big rock can make a 2 inch hole in my windshield.
13. my highway damage insurance deductible is 50.
14. lots of police officers in Austin have tattoos and are generally nice people.
15. speeding in a school zone and just paying the ticket: about 200 dollars. a big waste of money.
16. i probably won't sign up for the City School car pool program.