anger 101, part two

"...do not let the sun go down on your wrath,"  from Ephesians 4:26 (NKJV)

My husband Steve has the most integrity of any man I know.  I can count on one hand the times I've seen him angry and actually sin in his anger.  And by sin, I mean maybe raise his voice.  I trust him and his character.

And I can only imagine how it would feel to be betrayed by him.  Although it has never and will never be a concern of mine.  But I know enough women who have been betrayed by their husbands, to know that the kind of anger you feel doesn't go away before the sun sets.

I'm no Timothy Keller, and I admit I'm definitely not a theologian.  But I do know the character of God.  A God who is merciful, loving and grace-filled.  I don't believe this verse in Ephesians is telling us to be rid of our anger before we go to bed.  I do believe it's telling us to acknowledge it.  To not sin in it.  To give it over to God, but to not beat ourselves up if guess what? Our anger remains the next day. No woman (or man) who's been betrayed deeply gets over it in 12 hours or less.

"Don't give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life."  from Ephesians 4:26 (the Message)

In times of betrayal, we have to commit to forgive.  If we commit to forgive, to walk in a place where our hearts are open and not embittered, we are making strides in forgiveness.  We aren't giving the devil any kind of foothold. I also believe there are layers to forgiveness, just as there are layers to hurt.  As God makes things known that cause our anger, as we realize them anew, we commit to forgive.

God can and does diffuse anger.  He does grant sleep to a weary, battling heart.  It's the steps we take towards forgiveness that keep our hearts from becoming bitter.  Choosing not to forgive, choosing to sin in anger, these things lead to a bitter, hardened heart. 

God is strong, and he wants you strong.  So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials.  And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way.   from Ephesians 6:10,11 (the Message)