some thoughts on intercession
A few weeks ago, our elders at the Austin Stone had a q & a on marriage, and I particularly liked what Jennifer Carter shared about spiritual intimacy pertaining to prayer. She warned against dating couples praying alone together for hours at a time and used the phrase, "those who pray together, lay together." What I think she was speaking to is the intimacy shared in prayer time alone when there is already an emotional connection between a man and a woman. This is something God grows and uses in marriage, but outside of marriage can be used as a snare set by the enemy.
Intercessory prayer is unique in that the people I intercede for I don't always pray with, and I don't pray with the men alone. My intercession is time spent with God, not that person; praying His heart for those people. When I intercede for our pastor Matt and his wife Jennifer, occasionally we get together so the prayer team can pray over them, or we'll get together as families and pray. And when I pray alone, I ask God to show me what to share and what not to share. God trusts you as an intercessor, and He's going to show you things about that person that isn't always for sharing with them. It doesn't necessarily mean it's negative stuff, but He's taking you onto the battlefield to do battle for that person, and that doesn't mean dragging them on to it with you.
Sometimes I get asked by women how to guard their heart in prayer, and I know when I'm asked this it's because they are probably feeling an emotional attachment to the person they are praying with or for. Or maybe are afraid an attachment will develop. To care about the person you are praying for is not a bad thing as an intercessor, and actually helpful.
But if you feel spiritually or physically attracted to that person, it's a pretty definite sign you are not called to pray for them as an intercessor. As intercessors, our motives have to be pure. I mean, how in the world do we think God would bless our efforts if they were not? And if you try to continue in intercession with unpure motives, God isn't going to allow it. I don't and won't pray for anyone I'm attracted to. I just don't play that game because the enemy is more than eager to play it.
Another thing I'm asked is how you can be sure you are in God's will, in regards to who you are praying for. That you are not doing it out of your own interests. I have seen in my own life that God makes it clear by giving me a consistent burden to pray, and will give me encouragement to continue when I need it - but not necessarily on demand when I want it. He will speak clearly to me about those people. Intercession is a gift some people are going to value more than others, that's just the reality of it. It doesn't mean they need your intercession any less or you should pray in measure to their response. It's easy in our flesh to gage our response to the response we get. However, that's not how Jesus ever ministers. Thank God!
Also, if someone is not receptive to your prayers, seems wary of your motives, or you don't have joy in your intercession for them, I would take that as a pretty clear sign you are not called by God to pray for them.
I've read lots of great books on personal intercession, as that is what I'm primarily called to do. Personal intercession means praying for a person instead of a whole group...it does not necessarily mean that I pray for that person about their most intimate personal stuff! In my experience and in what I've read, mutual trust and communication are key in having a good personal intercessory relationship.
I value that in both Matt and Jennifer Carter. I know exactly the things Matt will bring to me for prayer and what he will not. That said, there are some people you may be burdened to pray for that you will have little or no communication with. It may be a whole city, a people group. God will be your primary encourager/informer in that case. Ask Him to give you cues as to when to pray, and He will.
It takes time to build a relationship of trust, but it's worth it to see how God blesses and uses the unity between the intercessor and the person they are praying for. There were times with Matt I just didn't believe that he even liked me, even though I knew he valued my prayers. I would get upset about things like him calling me "dude." It's seems really funny and stupid now, but I thought he was basically saying he thought of me as a guy, and he thought he was calling me a friend. Matt at one point told me he was going to pray for me to have always have a "positive' preset to know he wasn't thinking bad things about me.
It's easy to go there when you are the messenger, sharing maybe hard things you realize may convict that other person. His prayer impacted me and opened my eyes to just how much I was letting my flesh and the enemy mess with me. So trust those you pray for are not thinking evil thoughts about you, even if the enemy is putting that in your mind. Warfare is strategic and the enemy recognizes the power of unified prayer. With Matt, usually one of us is able to see when the enemy is trying to sabotage my intercession for him or Jennifer, and that's an invaluable tool. It would be easy to give up without that.
I have also learned to ask Matt and Jennifer how they think it's going in regards to intercession, because feedback helps us to grow in our gifts and it brings unity to our relationship. I think both Matt and Jennifer would tell you how much they value prayer - and certainly not just my own - because they see the fruits of it time and again in their lives. God just chooses to work through prayer, period. So keep fighting, keep blessing His name!
Intercessory prayer is unique in that the people I intercede for I don't always pray with, and I don't pray with the men alone. My intercession is time spent with God, not that person; praying His heart for those people. When I intercede for our pastor Matt and his wife Jennifer, occasionally we get together so the prayer team can pray over them, or we'll get together as families and pray. And when I pray alone, I ask God to show me what to share and what not to share. God trusts you as an intercessor, and He's going to show you things about that person that isn't always for sharing with them. It doesn't necessarily mean it's negative stuff, but He's taking you onto the battlefield to do battle for that person, and that doesn't mean dragging them on to it with you.
Sometimes I get asked by women how to guard their heart in prayer, and I know when I'm asked this it's because they are probably feeling an emotional attachment to the person they are praying with or for. Or maybe are afraid an attachment will develop. To care about the person you are praying for is not a bad thing as an intercessor, and actually helpful.
But if you feel spiritually or physically attracted to that person, it's a pretty definite sign you are not called to pray for them as an intercessor. As intercessors, our motives have to be pure. I mean, how in the world do we think God would bless our efforts if they were not? And if you try to continue in intercession with unpure motives, God isn't going to allow it. I don't and won't pray for anyone I'm attracted to. I just don't play that game because the enemy is more than eager to play it.
Another thing I'm asked is how you can be sure you are in God's will, in regards to who you are praying for. That you are not doing it out of your own interests. I have seen in my own life that God makes it clear by giving me a consistent burden to pray, and will give me encouragement to continue when I need it - but not necessarily on demand when I want it. He will speak clearly to me about those people. Intercession is a gift some people are going to value more than others, that's just the reality of it. It doesn't mean they need your intercession any less or you should pray in measure to their response. It's easy in our flesh to gage our response to the response we get. However, that's not how Jesus ever ministers. Thank God!
Also, if someone is not receptive to your prayers, seems wary of your motives, or you don't have joy in your intercession for them, I would take that as a pretty clear sign you are not called by God to pray for them.
I've read lots of great books on personal intercession, as that is what I'm primarily called to do. Personal intercession means praying for a person instead of a whole group...it does not necessarily mean that I pray for that person about their most intimate personal stuff! In my experience and in what I've read, mutual trust and communication are key in having a good personal intercessory relationship.
I value that in both Matt and Jennifer Carter. I know exactly the things Matt will bring to me for prayer and what he will not. That said, there are some people you may be burdened to pray for that you will have little or no communication with. It may be a whole city, a people group. God will be your primary encourager/informer in that case. Ask Him to give you cues as to when to pray, and He will.
It takes time to build a relationship of trust, but it's worth it to see how God blesses and uses the unity between the intercessor and the person they are praying for. There were times with Matt I just didn't believe that he even liked me, even though I knew he valued my prayers. I would get upset about things like him calling me "dude." It's seems really funny and stupid now, but I thought he was basically saying he thought of me as a guy, and he thought he was calling me a friend. Matt at one point told me he was going to pray for me to have always have a "positive' preset to know he wasn't thinking bad things about me.
It's easy to go there when you are the messenger, sharing maybe hard things you realize may convict that other person. His prayer impacted me and opened my eyes to just how much I was letting my flesh and the enemy mess with me. So trust those you pray for are not thinking evil thoughts about you, even if the enemy is putting that in your mind. Warfare is strategic and the enemy recognizes the power of unified prayer. With Matt, usually one of us is able to see when the enemy is trying to sabotage my intercession for him or Jennifer, and that's an invaluable tool. It would be easy to give up without that.
I have also learned to ask Matt and Jennifer how they think it's going in regards to intercession, because feedback helps us to grow in our gifts and it brings unity to our relationship. I think both Matt and Jennifer would tell you how much they value prayer - and certainly not just my own - because they see the fruits of it time and again in their lives. God just chooses to work through prayer, period. So keep fighting, keep blessing His name!